Recently, I dove into Adam Grant’s book Give and Take—a fascinating exploration of how different approaches to interactions shape our workplaces. Grant introduces three distinct types of people: Givers, Takers, and Matchers. These archetypes aren’t just labels; they’re a framework for understanding what drives success (or hinders it) in organizations. Let’s break them down:
- Givers focus on contributing in every interaction. They ask, “How can I help?” whether it’s through mentoring, sharing knowledge, or simply supporting colleagues.
- Takers look to extract value. Their mindset is, “What can I get out of this?” While takers often rise quickly, their decline is just as swift. Grant advises us to steer clear of them whenever possible.
- Matchers aim for balance, operating on a quid-pro-quo principle: “I’ll do something for you, but I expect something in return.”
Here’s the kicker: Grant’s research reveals that Givers are overrepresented at both the bottom and the top of organizational performance scales. Why? Those at the bottom prioritize helping others so much that they sacrifice their own productivity. But those at the top master the art of giving without burning out—and they outperform everyone else.
So, how do we harness the potential of Givers while avoiding burnout? Let’s explore some strategies.
3 Ways to Help Givers Thrive
1. Prevent Burnout
Givers often struggle to say no, which can lead to overwhelm. As leaders, it’s our job to protect them. Be mindful of how much they’re being asked to take on, and encourage balance in their workload.
2. Foster a Help-Seeking Culture
If your workplace tolerates Takers, Givers may hesitate to step up. Grant shares an example of two hospital floors: one with a designated Giver and one without. The floor with the Giver flourished because the culture encouraged collaboration and mutual support.
3. Hire (and Fire) Wisely
Getting the right people on the team is crucial—but so is keeping Takers out. A single Taker can poison the culture, undermining the very collaboration that helps organizations thrive.
Becoming a Leader Who Gives
Reading Grant’s work reminded me of the principles we teach at Dale Carnegie. Givers aren’t just born that way—they cultivate habits that make them indispensable. Here’s how you can foster those same habits in yourself and your team:
1. Choose Positivity
Negativity is contagious, and so is positivity. We all know those people who thrive on complaining, but they’re draining the energy of everyone around them. Start your day by choosing positivity. It’s a mindset that fuels better interactions and a more fulfilling life.
2. Be Genuine
Authenticity matters. Show vulnerability, share your thoughts, and truly listen to others. Let your values shine through, and give meaningful appreciation. People can sense when you’re genuine—and they’ll trust you more for it.
3. Focus on Others
It’s easy to get caught up in our own priorities, but imagine what’s possible when we care just a little more about the people around us. Ask what challenges they’re facing, what they might need, and how you can help.
4. Listen Actively
Active listening isn’t just a buzzword—it’s a superpower. Focus completely on the person in front of you. Listen to what they’re saying and what they’re not saying. Your attention is one of the greatest gifts you can give.
5. Bring Joy
Work doesn’t have to be all business. Smile more. Laugh often. Find ways to bring fun into what you do. Your enthusiasm will ripple through your team, creating a culture people want to be part of.
6. Understand What People Value
Go beyond surface-level conversations. Ask meaningful questions to uncover what matters most to the people you work with. When you know what drives them, you can connect in a more impactful way.
7. Remember Names
Forgetting someone’s name isn’t just a slip—it can signal a lack of attention. Practice techniques like repeating the name when you meet someone, using it in conversation, and creating associations to help you remember.
8. Celebrate Others’ Successes
Collaboration thrives when no one cares who gets the credit. Shift the spotlight to your team, share the wins, and prop each other up. A rising tide lifts all boats.
The Bigger Picture
Here’s the truth: Almost everything we do—professionally or personally—has a people component. What if we all decided to show up as Givers just a little more often? What would be possible for your organization? For your leadership?
Being a Giver isn’t always easy, but the rewards are worth it. Sometimes, you just need a little guidance to get started. That’s where we come in. At Fairwinds Training, we’re here to help you build stronger teams, foster a giving culture, and unlock your organization’s full potential.
So, what kind of leader do you want to be? Let’s work together to make it happen.